T describes his feelings following the birth in water of his son at Warwick Hospital in March 2011. T was in the pool with G throughout.
"I am losing track of time, how long I wonder have I even been in the pool? If I stood up at this moment, I'm sure I would be shaking. But, then L the midwife comes over to me behind G and puts the mirror in the water, and I stare in disbelief as I see a head emerging.......... at some point the midwife is telling me how I should catch the baby. I will need to pass in through her legs and not let its head come above the water, but my mind is such a state of excitement that I do not even process the instructions for a few seconds. I think about what I have to do. It would have been easier to just get up and walk away at this point. ...... I realise that I just have a simple job to do and buckle down for the final moment. In one big push the baby's head pops out. I am in awe at seeing my new child halfway in and out of this world. My heart is up in my throat. I gasp in a moment I have been waiting for the good part of a year .More pushing and the baby has twisted right up until the shoulder, just like I had heard it described to us in the NCT class. G's last push births our baby. I grab it as it descends into the water.......G reaches through her legs instinctively, and I push the baby through the water into her hands. She brings the baby up quickly above the water, and holds it to her chest. Relief as it is over, for now; the hard part is done. So, that is that, at least for me. Of course there was the third stage, but I honestly don't know when that finished. Everything else seemed so insignificant to the moment I had just witnessed. The baby seemed happy and alert, pawing around with its arms and opening its eyes. A new life, and a very precious one at that. G seems very relieved. At some point I am left holding the baby while she goes to lie down on the labour room bed. I realise that I am a father now. However, I didn't need to lose any blood that day, so really my physical cost was light.
To sum it all up, it was easily the most exiting moment of my life. I'm glad I could be there for that moment of birth, but it was a lot to handle. I'm really speechless when it comes to describing that feelings of happiness that I felt when our baby was born. It is hard to put into words that emotional surge of energy you feel when you are passing the baby to the mother. Raw emotion mixed with some primordial parenting instinct and a sense of relief is the best I can describe. My experience is not something I would trade for all the gold in the world. Our birthing partner and doula, Jackie, was indispensible. She reassured G through the whole thing and I really think that their personalities and energies aligned. During the entire ordeal, Jackie was a lifeline for G, and she was much calmer than me."
G comments
We decided to have a doula based on the positive evidence we read about from several baby books and friends about how birth-companions can improve outcomes in labour. Having my partner present at the birth was very important to me. Yet we thought that having a doula would offer additional benefit. We reasoned that a woman who had seen not just one or two births, but many, and who would be there all the way through from start to finish would improve my chances of a natural labour. In the end, having a doula was probably one of the best things we did to prepare for labour. It outgrew all our expectations. It was my first birth and I did not realise just how much emotional support I would need during labour. There were also many resources and information we received that we either did not know about or would not have thought of ourselves. Thanks again Jackie, I cannot thank you enough! G x
E-Mail from G's midwife following the above waterbirth at Warwick Hospital.
" I hope you don't mind me e-mailing you but I wanted to tell you what a positive experience I had today with G & T and yourself. Your support to them was amazing and I believe their fabulous birth was down to you.
I haven't always had positive experiences with doula's in the past but today has really shown me the benefits you guys
have and I hope to meet you again in the future. L. Midwife
